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Friday 24 June 2011

this and that


Life and death. Old and new. Finding and losing. Giving and taking. Winter, spring, summer and autumn. Joy and grief. Celebration and mourning. All of this, a part of the journey we call life.

All in the past week or two:

One of my mum's best friends has died of cancer, leaving a son who's a little younger than me. 'It's not fair'. 'Fair' doesn't really exist on this side of death, I'm beginning to think. Although we do a good job of pretending, or of trying to make it our right. But we are not invincible. Who knows what will happen tomorrow? So... even more reason to embrace today. She was only 50-something and will leave a big gap in many people's lives. A gap. A loss. An empty space. Nothing can fill those spaces. In the past, when I've left a place and gone somewhere new I've tried to fit new friends into the spaces of old friends. "Oh, you're just like so and so...". But it doesn't work like that, does it?

On the other end of the spectrum, my friends Adele and Larry have had a baby called Talitha. New life, a new person, so exciting... the 9 months of waiting make it even more so!! Can't wait to meet her.

And last weekend, a dear friend who's like a brother to me got married. Marriage is both life and death in a sense. They die to themselves, to their independent, all-about-me, life and start out on a new togetherness that's far deeper than anything they've experienced so far. Maybe that's why I often feel a little weird at weddings - there's often a sad moment. because, things won't ever be the same. And this is good and exciting, yet it also requires a 'leaving behind...'

I'm also currently reading 'Desert Flower' - the autobiography of Waris Dirie, Somalian model and UN ambassador who now campaigns against female genital mutilation ( bet that caused a sudden intake of breath! - not a 'pleasant' thought, no, but that wasn't the point of this post...) Her story puts a lot of these life/loss/love/death thoughts in perspective... I have no idea about suffering... not really.

Anyways, more another time perhaps. Back to studying Katrina!

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